The future was on mind, the path sublime
but then I see myself covered by the haze
hard times come on way, but am I ever gonna learn
Had there been light, I would have chosen to return
love is strange, it often lets you down
takes you like a roller coaster,
through all those ups and downs
Had there been love, I would have crossed the bounds
too much I rely on hope, sometimes it blinds me from the truth
the trust I find in others, the pain that it soothes
the strength that it weakens through delusions,
is it the evil or does it lead me to my goal
Had there been glory, I would have found my colorful soul
In destiny do I believe
my thoughts slaved under its control
feelings choose dejection, nothing stoked than sheer failure’s frustration
Had there been luck, I would have defied my future’s dusk
Filed under: Hope, Poems | 2 Comments
Grab the book nearest to you, turn on page 18 and find line 4… ‘But his father had taught him to be respectful of the elderly.’ – The Alchemist
Stretch your left arm out as far as you can & catch air? – Shaf’s head
What is the last thing you watched on TV? – India vs Srilanka final match
Without looking, guess what time it is? – 5:05 AM
Now look at the clock, what is the actual time? – 5:14 AM.. It’s time to sleep I guess. Hav to go for work later
With the exception of the computer, what can you hear? – The sound of our freaking fan
When did you last step outside? What were you doing? – Yestday mornin, to my office. Not to freak out for sure…
Before you started this Q&As, what did you look at? – An article on Cotard’s Syndrome(Its a feeling that you’re dead, a walking corpse, tht u’ve lost your body or a part of it, tht ur flesh is rotting and u can feel worms crawling inside ur skin and such crazy stuff….)
What are you wearing? – Just Jeans. I love to sleep in my jeans…
When did you last laugh? – Yesterday evening, thinkin of my mngr’s stupidity.
What is on the walls of the room you are in? – My dance group batchsnap, and a guitar.
Seen anything weird lately? – A camel’s head decorated on a chair 😦
What do you think of this quiz? – A sort of timepass
What is the last film you saw? – Aliens in the Attic
If you became a multimillionaire overnight, what would you buy? – A perfect wife probably ;-).. Na na, wait a sec….I’d go for a Porsche Carrera
Tell something about you that people dunno! – That I can be angry sometimes…’My Violent Streak is vicious’ 😉
If you could change one thing about the world, regardless of guilt or politics, what would you do? – I’ll club this world into one, erasing all these boundaries. ‘Enter any place at your will’..
Do you like to Dance? – Every step I take is a dance move!!
Imagine your first child is a girl, what do you call her? – Hafsa!!
Imagine your first child is a boy, what do you call him? – I don’t want a boy.. Period!
Would you ever consider living abroad? – That’d be my first priority
What do you want GOD to say to you when you reach the pearly gates? – ‘This was the guy I had been waiting to spend my time with.. Come zubair, lets hav a drink(non-alcoholic)!!’
Filed under: Fun, Nothing-ness | 5 Comments
The day I turned 15, my father had a car accident. Me and mum rushed to the hospital as soon as we got the news. I could see my father’s face while he was being operated. We waited for an hour outside. Later, Mum spoke to the doctor for a while and went in to see my dad. She came out weeping, held me tight and said, ‘Your Dad is no more’.
My mother found it hard to meet the ends, with me going to school. she soon got addicted to those pills and had to rely on getting high to control over the stress and depressions. She had all those scars on her skin. Her wrist was particularly red. It was always a mess in our house and the nights used to be damn scary. I used to see a new person visiting my mum everyday and there was all noise later. As I had a hard time sleeping, I used to get out on the roof top and look at those wonderful stars. Each of them seemed to have a surprise for me. May be they were waiting for the right moment, I don’t know. But the moon was different. It looked evil and dark. The big scar reminded me of my dad’s face when he had his accident. Dreaming of the ‘still to come’ future, I used to doze off in the cold.
But I could not take it long. I went to my uncle, who advised me to go to the city, where I could work at a restaurant and do my studies too. It seemed to be a valid option and so, I took off one day without telling my mom.
The city was so refreshing, me being a first time visitor. There were busy people all over, fuzzy cars, cranky trains and illuminated nights. I was so much excited. I went to the restaurant the next day. But it was no restaurant. There was smoke all over, girls dancing and men with their drinks shouting like mads. I asked the bartender and went up to this man, my uncle had asked me to contact to. He was Saturn. He took me inside a room, where I found a couple of other girls, who looked confused like the way I was. We waitied for half an hour in there and were later taken downstairs, which rather looked like a big mansion. And yes, it was ofcourse a mansion. An old mansion, which a Jew had once built for himself and his four wives, but was soon incarcerated during the invasion while his wives simply disappeared later. My master ‘saturn’ had then since occupied this place, paying up a couple of grands to those soldiers.
We were asked to choose our rooms, and so we did. My roommate was a dark girl, her hair all curly and her arm bearing this strange tattoo, something that resembled a full moon, but with rays. She introduced herself as ‘Carla’. I was all tired and so I had a quick bath and a goodnights sleep. For the next few days, we did nothing but just sit in our room and talk about things happening. Carla taught me how to dance. Some of the girls never used to speak, they were so harsh. I should say, it was an all girls place. But a couple days later, I was asked to get dressed in a given attire and to put on some strange makeup. Carla helped me out with the same. She too joined me to the restaurant later. I was made to sit with a man, and then was to serve drinks for him. It was not so comfortable. He spoke to me about his wife, his children and his unhappiness. I was rather looking at other people. Everything seemed so strange. After a couple of hours, we could hear the cops cars beeping. Saturn came up to us and asked the man politely to packup for today and he obliged. Carla and me went up to our room. I was slowly gettin aware of things. I was not so happy to stay there, but I had no other place to go. Plus I had taken up ‘micro biology’ at this downtown college. I was asked not to stay up late after the classes. Daily, I used to sit with these so called Sad people, and serve them drinks. Some of them used to cry so much. They always used to talk about their loneliness. But they all looked so innocent. A few were just drunkards. I gradually started to understand them. The cause of their unhappiness, although its hard to state it. After a few days, saturn made me have the same tattoo as carla had. But I chose to have it on my belly.
The next day, I received this letter from my uncle. My mother did choose to leave this world. It was just a tear that rolled out on my cheek, coz I had carla, who was there for me always, and from then on who was my only family along with my ‘Master’. I sometimes took up to dancing at the restaurant. But it was always my choice. The master was always nice to me. He treated me as his own daughter. He also gave this wonderful white gown on Christmas. Carla got a red one, but mine was much better for sure.
One day, this man, a littled aged and limping, who always preferred to sit with carla, asked for me this time. Saturn wasn’t too happy about it. But he was a regular customer. I served the man for a while. He hardly spoke. Saturn continued to have an eye on this man. But then, carla suddenly fainted. Saturn rushed over to her, and took her downstairs. But this man did not leave me. I had started feeling dizzy, may be it was for the drink I had. He forced me out of the restaurant and cuffed me to the window of his car and started driving. I could see Saturn running to get a grip of the car but then he backed off. After a while, the man took me to this bridge. He took out an old photograph from his coat. It was of my father, but without a limb. The scar was clearly visible on his face. I did not understand. He came closer and hugged me tight. I could feel his tears on my shoulder. He whispered my name. But I pushed him off me. Then he got down on his knees, and started weeping. I went upto him and asked who he was. He mumbled ‘I am Mark. Mark Higgins. Your Father, my girl’. I screamed, ‘My father is dead’. But somewhere beneath, i could recognize his voice.
He then explained, how my Mum chose to leave him when his limb was to be cut after the accident, how he turned out to be so rich after he had met this woman who fell in love with him while he was working at her factory, how he had a facial surgery that changed his looks, and how one day the lady he was in love with succumbed to cancer. He also showed his artificial limb. I kept dumb all along, trying to control my tears. He then took out the keys, and came to me to take off my cuffs, when I suddenly saw a car rushing towards us. It was saturn. I just kept looking. My father, forced me out of the way, while the car dragged him long. The fences broke, and in a fraction, Mark and the car were off the bridge and into the water. That was to be the last day, I would speak to my fathers.
Now I live in a big mansion on this far away hill with Carla. Saturn had all his property on carla’s and my name, in his will. Plus, my father too left me a huge amount. I don’t know, but I seem to be quite happy now. I still look at the stars. They ofcourse had for me a lot of surprises. But the moon too turned out to be good. May be it was my father who had always been watching me, while I grew up. You know, its a different feeling.
-This is Sasha Higgins.
PS: This is my first story, am putting into writing. I know, it hasn’t turned out to be good, but then, am happy that I ‘ve atleast made an attempt 🙂 ..And you know wot.. i took just an hour to think as well as write this article..hahha..
Filed under: Hope | 7 Comments
Tags: girl, Story
Lets dream, you and I
with humble hearts, beyond the sky
with thoughts of faith and belief
transcending the peaks so high, in every try
Its always been so hard and tough
walking through these deserted streets
the cold wind, blowing up these withered leaves
the pain deep within, your skin perceived
The hollow path, which lead nowhere
the fear, the temptation, of getting swayed
carried along by the smutty desires
sheer vicious, clear specious, the demon conspires
Lets choose, you and I
love, hell, blasphemy and heaven, here lie
hallowed would be us, our dreams would fly
through these eternal stars
if we dispose the wrong from right
this simple path of faith, to we comply
Filed under: Hope, Poems | 1 Comment
Tags: blasphemy, dream, faith
This onez from my old blog:
Riding in the darkness
I see through your eyes
When the moon is fading
In the wonderful sky
Am holding you tight
On this dried up sea
I can feel your heartbeat
And you’re right under me
I love the way you look
I love the way you run
You lure my heart
With your power so stern
N you’re smart
You simply rock on the roads
You’re the one in my heart
Driving and steering
You see no bar
Thats my bike
The tvs Apache 160 RTR
And I call her Trin – for trinity.
Filed under: Love, Poems | 1 Comment
Tags: Apache rtr, Love my bike